Reminds me of an old flash video by Jim Ether hosted on thefriendsociety called “Don’t touch the pan.” It lasted about 5 seconds, looped, and is no longer available for our viewing pleasure, but it was scripted as thus:

Person 1: “Don’t touch the pan! The pan’s hot.”
Person 2: “I’m going to touch the pan.”
Person 2 touches the pan.
Person 2 screams in agonizing pain at probably 10x decibels louder than the rest of the speech.

How about, “oh fuck, my carpal tunnel is back at it again” or something.

Ah! the one Theodore Sturgeon story I did not need to read, as I experiecd it in real life!

Dude…

Alex, taking his food from grandma’s oven.