You’re forgetting the power of marketing. Call it “Atomic Premium”, claim it’s formulated specifically for giant trucks with fake balls attached to the hitch, get a few hick-hop artists to name drop it in songs about cruising down red dirt roads, and run a meme campaign implying only woke blue-haired lib trannies with nose rings oppose irradiated gas. They’d drink it if they thought doing so would “own the libs”.