I will confirm that I did it by posting “I did it” here. This will negate any need for any type of photographic or other tangible evidence because I’m an honest person and you’re horrible for suggesting otherwise.
Edit: Bunch of damn pyros in this thread.
Stick it in the front yard with a sign that says
Free soiled mattress!
Whomever takes it is now your bff
No sign required, you have a big canvas already. Just need some spray paint.