• TouchMacaque@lemmy.ca
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    1 day ago

    My neighbor’s wife’s dog’s previous owner’s dental assistant’s husband somehow did the jump between timelines and told us about the timeline where Harambe didn’t get murdered.

    It’s not at all what you’d expect, in the other timeline some Elvis impersonator from Vegas became president in the 2016 and his first order of business was to order ICE to detain all Beatles fans and deport them to England. The cost of the operation bankrupted the nation and for some reason everyone blamed Harambe. A crowd of 2500 people marched to the zoo and lynched Harambe. Doing so resulted in an economic boom but also released some sort of respiratory virus that spread worldwide and caused millions of deaths. A few years later that guy from the apprentice became president and the timelines converged into the same situation we have now.

    In the end nothing changed except all the Beatles fans are in England now and they prevented Brexit so I guess that’s pretty cool.