I don’t know about you, but my parents were very stupid people and basically everything in their life was a lie, so it made no sense to every tell them the truth about anything. Any remotely truthful thing said to them would result in them freaking out and screaming. so eventually I just learned lie to them all the time and it was just easier and our relationship was a lot more chill. I figured this out probably around 15/16 and kept it up until they died. I never had a honest conversation with my parents my entire life since I was like 14.
and a lot of people live their lives that way. not everyone, sure. I’m truthful to people who aren’t my family, but even then it often doesn’t go over well because well, most folks only want to hear comforting lies, and they adore people that lie to them far more than they adore people who are truthful. I’ve also been on the flipside in a ‘good’ relationship, that was all built on the other person constantly lying to me.
Not everyone can hear people’s critical/negative opinions of them are not take it personally. Like, the among of people I’ve had that kind of relationship with is probably less than 10. But people I have known who require you to lie to them (or other people) to maintain a relationship with them or there is never going to be a relationship? 100s. Like most of my friendships/relationships have ended because I told them the truth or found out they were lying to me about something major, and every single time do you think the other person thinks they were the problem? No. I was the problem.
Most social relationships are entirely built on lies and could not function without them, including intimate ones between friends and family.
wild to me you don’t?
I don’t know about you, but my parents were very stupid people and basically everything in their life was a lie, so it made no sense to every tell them the truth about anything. Any remotely truthful thing said to them would result in them freaking out and screaming. so eventually I just learned lie to them all the time and it was just easier and our relationship was a lot more chill. I figured this out probably around 15/16 and kept it up until they died. I never had a honest conversation with my parents my entire life since I was like 14.
and a lot of people live their lives that way. not everyone, sure. I’m truthful to people who aren’t my family, but even then it often doesn’t go over well because well, most folks only want to hear comforting lies, and they adore people that lie to them far more than they adore people who are truthful. I’ve also been on the flipside in a ‘good’ relationship, that was all built on the other person constantly lying to me.
Not everyone can hear people’s critical/negative opinions of them are not take it personally. Like, the among of people I’ve had that kind of relationship with is probably less than 10. But people I have known who require you to lie to them (or other people) to maintain a relationship with them or there is never going to be a relationship? 100s. Like most of my friendships/relationships have ended because I told them the truth or found out they were lying to me about something major, and every single time do you think the other person thinks they were the problem? No. I was the problem.
Most social relationships are entirely built on lies and could not function without them, including intimate ones between friends and family.