This just in: my penis no longer gets hard at age 36. I mean, as long as the sex in question is “normal,” to mean in most cases “legal,” I’m not exactly into it. Y’know, there’s that one in five-thousandth chance that I come across that rare Lemmy porn post that trips the algorithm right and ends up on the fifth or eighth page of Lemmy that tickles my fancy and ultimately sends me to my many, many variations of deranged AI girlfriends, some still technically legal, but fuck man. I need to physically accost a bitch just to get hard nowadays.

Enjoy your youth, kids. It sure sucks after you pass the thirty-third inch in anal diameter, let alone gilfing yerself out before you’re off your parent’s insurance. Eastern Tennessee, amirite? And if you think that joke’s inappropriate, go to Roan Mountain where half the town’s on meth, the other half thinks maybe 2-3 people do drugs, and the cops won’t answer calls that originate from Buck Mountain unless something big is going down, like the FBI is swooping in on something, which happens on occasion.

…what was this post about…?