I went years not eating these because of the terror and anxiety of having to open one. And one day by chance (dropped it in the sink that had water in it.) I found the secret to not getting the piss scared out of you.
Here it is. These cans are cardboard. Cardboard disintegrates in water.
If you peel back just a little of the paper. And sit it in a bowl, Make sure the side you peeled is facing down. and pour in a little water.
Then quickly leave the room or put it in your fridge or something. And in a minute or two it will pop open. And you will hear it from a safe distance. And you will be okay.
So if you peel it too much it will sometimes pop while peeling.
If you don’t peel it enough and wack it on the counter, it won’t pop. So then you try peeling it again.
Sometimes that will make it pop. Sometimes not.
It’s the unpredictability of the damn things.
Sounds like you’re doing too much peeling and not enough tapping
There’s a sweet spot like a ketchup bottle. It’s like 1/3 of the way down, you only have to peel it a little bit and tap the right spot onto the corner of the counter
And I’m 40 and still haven’t figured it out.
I peel a little and then dig my thumb into the seam. I used to use a spoon, but it was too unpredictable. I used to be afraid that it would somehow hurt my thumb, but it just pops with a little poof of air and some noise. It was a hard fear to overcome, but fuck those biscuit cans, I’ll bite them bitches open now! (Not really bite though, that’s too much)
I applaud your tenacity to defeat the biscuit terror.
I know it’s a stupid fear. I know it’s illogical. The can can’t hurt me. Yet…
It’s like that puff of air at the eye doctor they use to check eye pressure.
I know it won’t hurt me. Yet I often blink (another reflex) and they have to do it more than once.
A “thumb”, sure