It’s not haveful enough. It needs an angry condescending soyjak in a dentist gear saying:

Okay, you tell me you flossed, but was that floss called <brand name> Ultra Whitening Plus? Let’s talk about your toothpaste! <brand name 1> Sensitive White is garbage, you need to use the much more expensive and harder to come by <brand name 2> Herbal with Chamomille! Let me guess, you also didn’t use the most expensive electric toothbrush! So now I can shame you into paying me the price of a flagship model smartphone each time I pull your teeth out, to be replaced with a proper option. You don’t have the money? Too bad, my elders have lobbied out that teeth should be seen by politicians as “something you smile with” and “something you 100% responsible for”, and otherwise you can always just eat pulpy food for the rest of your life. You’re literally worse than Hitler and Stalin combined for having your teeth eventually go bad, which I pretend is the fault of you not using the right brand of dental hygiene products the right way! Put Mao Ce Tung and Pol Pot into the mix if you have the genes that will make your teeth go bad much quicker.