And the riddle is “give the cuties whatever they want before they murder you on the literal stairs of death”

You should duck.

Because that would be Data.

Charlie Brown turned into a truck driver?!

But I liked LMDE…

(Not enough to use it, mind, but it’s not bad. EOS, at the moment.)

Vader hated the moff that commanded it so much that he didn’t do the sensible thing and post up above where the people shot at.

To be fair, we all cheered a little when he choked that bitch out.

They don’t, actually.

The plastic on the handle is a thermoplastic. Every time you send it through the dishwasher, it loosens a bit each time. Eventually the handle will become a danger to use with no way to fix. Before that happens, small gaps form which will harbor bacteria.

Also the water spray causes them to bounce around and dull (or in the case of the OP’s ceramic, chip)

Finally, the harsh deferent used degrades the plastic. This won’t have any issues that’ll crop up before the first two become problematic, but it will cake the plastic to turn whitish

Basically, my parents agree with you and also wonder why my knives actually stay sharp.

or maybe he’s just gloating.

because Mischief Managed (and hooman hasn’t found it yet.)

I mean, what was it? the 14th they pushed an AI slop update that bricked computers compliments of bitllocker?

tastes like chicken.

Most cats tolerate me, at the very least.

Eventually they may even deign to like me

Same. and that’s my point.

if we were bastards, they wouldn’t be as dangerous as they are. Trying to stop something from hurting you when you don’t want to hurt it… is a lot harder to do.

Ostriches, emu and cossawry are all dangerous, yes.

The thing is, we generally don’t want to kill them.

They may have stringer bones than flying birds, but there still somewhat hollow and still very likely come out losing harder than a human would.

If you’re mad enough you can just punt them. Birds-including swans- are pretty easy to hurt.

Can they hurt humans? Sure. Would they win a fight if we took the gloves off? No.

(Just leave them alone, and we can all be cool- us over here and them over there.)

Definitely swan propaganda

Pretty sure it was frog eggs, actually.

“that’s a shame. I was going to leave this can of tuna here.”

Cats exist as examples of being ungovernable.

(There’s a fun book if you’re interested… Lessons From Cats For Surviving Fascism)

*Boop!*

calm down. i ordered some pizza.

I bet everyday was exciting around those three!