Also one of the defining traits of our species is our propensity to try varied means of social organization. To act like hunter gatherer H. sapiens were all modeling their societies the same way in regards to gendered division of labor flies in the face of what has been observed in the historical and archeological records.

The Dawn of Everything goes heavily into this and is a fascinating book

So my father did it, and I don’t think it was intentional, the big thing was that his perspective was to be treated as objective fact in discussions in which he was a part. You could say something like “I’m cold” and he’d respond with “it’s not cold” in a frustrated tone. The long and short of it in how it fucked me up is that I struggle to trust my own subjective reality and feel the need to get permission to feel things. That can be a real problem when it comes time to form and maintain boundaries for example.

Yeah I associate it with uncontrolled BPD and it fucking terrifies me at this point because of the experiences that caused that association. Being put on a pedestal sucks, your successes become expected and your failures become catastrophic. But also you can feel trapped for fear of hurting someone who you do like who’s in a bad place. And from there enforcing boundaries can start to feel like hurting them.

With my wife we still make points to express that we’d be ok and manage if the other left. Our finances are built with that in mind even. Knowing I can leave makes me always aware of how I don’t want to, and it makes us safe and secure in the fact that we know the other doesn’t want to.

With someone coming on too strong too fast you need to keep your eyes open and be aware of your boundaries. It may be someone who’s awesome and sincere who’s just on a different pace than you, it may be an intentional abuser being machiavellian, but it’s also got a pretty good chance of being someone unstable and sincere and oh fucking boy will that cause problems if you don’t have and maintain boundaries.

Yeah it’s a tone indicator “this may be taken as having a serious or upset tone, but wasn’t meant that way” though it also can mean “please don’t be upset” in the case of something like “sorry I disappeared for a bit, life happened lol”

Because in most aspects of human endeavor close to success means try again. You may say that that’s true, but only for games of genuine skill, and yes, but part of why gambling fucks with our brains so much is that for a lot of people that difference isn’t instinctive.

Yeah if your finances are exciting then you’re either taking massive risks or you’re investing in companies that feel it’s worth spending money that could go to investments or dividends to ensure investors are excited. Either way it’s a bad position to be in

Yeah if anything gambling is the hot new addiction for young people. Gen Z drinks less, does less drugs, and even fucks less, but they gamble more. As a millennial I remember when gambling was mostly old people at casinos, but that’s not the face of modern gambling. These days it’s online casinos and sports betting apps. It’s increasingly stuff like polymarket.

The seed they need isn’t just that they’re being spied on, but that it’s personally bad for them when compared to not having the device. Alternatives that may be more expensive, but are safer and within their capacity are also valuable.

This is especially a thing with ring cameras. One thing I do is be very upfront about how despite being a victim of the sort of rare crime that inspires people get them out of fear, I didn’t respond by buying one or a gun, I then explain why and what alternative I’m going with instead. The cops showed me clearly why they can’t be trusted to use camera footage responsibly on behalf of victims when they were loudly demanding answers about my weed bowl but couldn’t be bothered to look at the footprints under the window with a cut screen, instead insisting we’d left the door the invader left through unlocked.

Yeah, I’ve had the misfortune of meeting some of them irl. Like, theoretically I’m all for people engaging in informal academics, striving to be more thoughtful, and generally trying to challenge their thoughts and be better. However, these people keep going on insane paths such as inventing a hell based on artificial intelligence using game theory to ensure it gets created and so fucking much race science.

Unfortunately these people are increasingly relevant to everyone’s lives. Sam Altman comes out of it, as did the effective altruism movement and Sam Bankman Freid. They’ve got a strong following in Silicon Valley and have some overlap with the technofascism movement coming out of it.

There’s a community on lemmy to mock them at their craziest if anyone’s interested called sneerclub.

Yeah that’s basically what anyone who knows a lot about the culture that formed in the wake of the fanfic thinks. That and the fact that members of that community are too insufferable for lemmy

No, plenty of replies on here aren’t pedantic at all

Would she be sleeping with them otherwise?

Not if they’re talking about it like that. I’d be pissed if a partner or metamour was talking about it like that

Surely that post wasn’t that long ago…

An asshole who was notably dead weight in every project?

Did you like those fancy tools they gave you in school? You can cling to your memories of them as you attempt to recreate their functionality in excel without your boss noticing that you’re wasting time on this

In my experience both are particularly sensitive to opinionated women who take no shit

I met my best friends over the internet in my late 20s during the pandemic. But it was a d&d lfg group and we’re just the ones who actually played. I actually spend a month living with one of them when I moved out west last year

Ah I see the problem. Too low dose of atropa belladonna