“Farting next to me is assault. Yes, that’s right. When you choose to release gas, you are effectively forcing airborne particles into my nasal passages without my explicit, documented permission. Had you practiced basic etiquette and asked, “May I forcefully force my fart into your nose?” I would have promptly declined and sprinted away from you like a scared little girl. To anyone who will ever try to sneak one next to me, I pray the universe rewards you with nothing but unmitigated misfortune”
Don’t worry all I can translate:
“Farting next to me is assault. Yes, that’s right. When you choose to release gas, you are effectively forcing airborne particles into my nasal passages without my explicit, documented permission. Had you practiced basic etiquette and asked, “May I forcefully force my fart into your nose?” I would have promptly declined and sprinted away from you like a scared little girl. To anyone who will ever try to sneak one next to me, I pray the universe rewards you with nothing but unmitigated misfortune”