So I have a young teen entering 7th grade and so they’re about to receive their first phone. With that, it opens a lot of doors to all the big tech social media apps and privacy invasive services.
I’m not sure how to approach this. My parents probably want tracking features so it’ll probably be Find My or a 3rd party app like life360 depending on if we choose iphone or degoogled pixel.
Social media I’m not sure if fediverse stuff is the right path especially for lemmy, since it’s just tech nerd stuff and politics which isn’t interesting really unless they go out of their way to find smaller communities. Their friends will probably force them onto Instagram or some shit and I don’t really want them doomscolling on reels, that shit algorithm, and the malicious messaging app built in to it.
It’s just kinda hard trying to blend being a functional member of society and maintain your mental well being and privacy.
I think authoritarianism is a giant mistake and only creates duplicitous behavior. In my opinion tracking is ridiculous. None of us existed like this and ended up fine. In my opinion, all of this nonsense is acting as a stand in for relationships and real parenting. Humans make decisions and develop ethics based upon trust and autonomy. By stealing that factor of trust and autonomy, and replacing it with authoritarianism a parent is stunting the child’s growth of independent ethics and character. Make compelling discussions of why they should do whatever thing, but let them decide their own path. The lack of compelling discussions and real trust that requires risk is a major factor in the problems that exist in the present world.
The one time you actually need to know where your kid is at because something has happened, you will not know because you have taught them that the only path to independence is to turn off the device and put it into a Faraday cage like pouch, or someone else will do so. If you have a fundamentally trusting relationship with open dialog and respect for their autonomy, they will tell you openly exactly where they are going and any potential for danger. If you can handle that information without allowing anxiety to overwhelm reasoning skills, you will be in a far better position to help them if something bad happens.
The most long term valuable aspect of schooling is the development of one’s social network and connections, along with the habits and ethics. The actual information learned is rather limited in valuable application in the end. Who one knows and how one appears to others is of far more value than what one knows. For these reasons, there may be value in corporate social media. Simply teach the kid to understand how these places are both a trap and a tool. A trap, in that many of the smartest humans are manipulating users in ways that are nearly impossible for the users to escape. Never invest emotions into such a trap. Use the tool if needed for external social benefits, but use it as a manipulation tool with a layer of disconnect from who you really are. Teach them to use a work profile to isolate any apps from their device. That is just how I look at the issue.