• tetris11@feddit.uk
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    6 days ago

    Open scene. The shadow of a nuclear blast eclipses the sun and our eponymus character holds onto his hat as photon trails bombard his glasses in slow motion. An orchestra of immense magnitude begins playing a single brass note, or a bunch of different ones at the same time it doesn’t matter.

    Einstein rides up to him on a motorbike, spits on the ground, rubs his dirty hands on his greasy overalls. “What’choo thinkin’ 'bout Opey?”

    Oppenheimer places one hand into his pocket, and the other adjusts his Rolex before flicking off his Oaklies and grinning. “I think it’s time we go mushroom picking.”

    “Well sheeeet” muses Einstein in his native Swabish accent, whilst revving up his Harley. “I thought you’d never ask. Hop on you sum’ bi’h!”

    Oppenheimer approaches the bike like Legolas approaches an elephant, and grabs onto the front handlebars, and does a sideways flip onto the back of the Harley, as Einstein burns a 180 and makes a beeline for the mushroom cloud as Lady Gaga sings a cover of AC/DC’s Highway to Hell.

    “Most magnanimous, most magnanimous indeed!” mutters Nolan’s signature cameo character, watching the scene unfold as the camera pans to him, and he dabs mournfully.