• Dharma Curious (he/him)@slrpnk.net
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    37
    ·
    6 hours ago

    Have… Have y’all considered not marrying partners that you don’t share interests with? Like, I know I’m an edge case in that I’m 35, gay, and have never had a live in partner, but it’s really not that scary being single until you find someone you actually enjoy being with. Either it’ll happen or it won’t, but I’d rather be single and able to enjoy my hobbies and passions than be with someone who shares none of them.

    • Smoogs@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      2 hours ago

      how do we know the person who posted is not just being extra about reasonable boundaries?

    • krashmo@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      46
      ·
      6 hours ago

      You don’t have to share every hobby. You just need to not shame each other for enjoying different things.

    • HeyJoe@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      15
      ·
      6 hours ago

      Sometimes you just don’t discover everything out about that person even years after being with them. This is especially true when you meet at younger ages. Also everyone changes the older you get. The person you marry can absolutely change over a decade as everything becomes a never ending routine and you each find things you can no longer tolerate as much as you used to when you dated and tried harder (for some reason) to be like the other person. Knowing this now I wish it was mandatory for everyone to wait 5 years before getting engaged and 2 of those years has to be living together. Even then you never know who they will be 10 years from now. The worst part about getting older is wishing you knew all of what you know now but 20-30 years ago so you could have actually applied it when it mattered.