It’s not a general purpose wand. It’s more like a D&D wand that only cast one spell. It can basically stun lock certain target persons.
There has to be a “loose like sleeve of wizard” joke somewhere in there.
Well first you put on your robe and wizard hat
Don’t fuck with me, bitch. I’m the mightiest sorcerer of the land.
Keep on the lookout for stampeding rhinos.
Oh that’s the reason the robes are designed that way
Spell of toes curling
It can only cast two spells:
-
Relieve muscle cramps
-
Female orgasm
But those are very good spells.
-
Look at those walls…
This is proof that there’s somebody out there that basically lives in an at-least-roomscale cosplay-space of a medieval wizard tower.
ORGAZMO
Unhand her, Jizmaster Zero!
JIZMASTER ZERO/CLARK
You can’t defeat me, Orgazmo!
ORGAZMO
Yeah I can too!
Orgazmo points the cone on his right arm at Jizmaster
Zero. A Cheesy ray appears, accompanied by an equally
cheesy sound. Jizmaster moans with pleasure, as if having
an orgasm, and falls off of Saffi. Orgazmo uses this
chance to charge at the villain.
I found the entire script on archive.org just trying to find this scene lol
It casts a touch range spell, the somatic component consists of switching it on and applying it to the spell’s target in the right way, and the result is typically the target squirming around and making happy noises. They have disadvantage on all checks for 1d12 rounds.
Where does one aquire wizard robes?
Wait for a wizard to head for the hot tub and grab it from the changing room.
Tailor shop. You can try the armor shop, too, but that’s more hit or miss for cloth items.
Or, if you’re the daring type, a wizard’s tower.
I put on my robe and wizard hat…
For more information, ponder us on your orb.
Spills. You cast spills with that.
