• GeriatricGambino@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    edit-2
    2 months ago

    When I was fairly younger, I was in a relationship with a woman who told me that if she were to learn that I had sex with a man, especially bottoming but also topping (she didn’t use those terms, she used bad terms), then she would feel disgusted and betrayed and would never feel attracted to me again or see me as a man again.

    I said to her that I was disappointed in her, that she had internalised homophobia and that she was a massive hypocrite. Her self proclaimed best male friend presented to the world as flamingly gay, and she was openly bi herself, not as in “I would totally fuck women cause I like the idea of it”, bus as in she had fucked women before and would do it again. Apparently she deserves to be fucked by a real man, which apparently bi men are not.

    So…yeah, you can be a loudly proclaimed ally AND a member of the LGBTQ community yourself, and still be a disgusting homophobe right alongside the best of bigots.

    • hushable@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      2 months ago

      I have a similar story to share.

      When I was in my early 20s I briefly dated a girl who told me she was having feelings for another woman and was being curious, she eventually broke up with me in order to be with her, but we remained good friends after that.

      Eventually she came out as a lesbian and when I told her that I was bi she immediately ended our friendship all even yelled some slurs at me.

      AFAIK she’s married with a guy and has kids now

      • Dragon Rider (drag)@lemmy.nz
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        2 months ago

        Maybe calling women lesbians instead of gay allows people to be homophobic while accepting lesbians. After all, the word was invented by men who thought women couldn’t be gay the way men can.