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  • Domi@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    10·
    1 month ago

    I had a great day and a terrible day. Great day was going out to queer campy cabaret, in girl mode in public for the first time ever, and I had an absolute blast. I got heartfelt compliments from total strangers, met new friends. All in all a great first time out.

    The next day, hungover, no makeup, no wig, felt like I was stuffing “her” back into a box. Miserable. Today feeling drained and flat, full of fear, impatiently waiting to start hormones.

    My biggest fear is that for some reason my body will reject the hormones and I’ll be stuck in it because I’m just not trans enough or some shit. I think that probably doesn’t make much sense but it was all I could think about today.

    Had a big cry. Talked to my wonderful friend @jamie_veal@feddit.org about it. Feel a bit more level again now.

    • JayJLeas@lemmy.worldEnglish
      7·
      1 month ago

      Hey chica bella, I understand your fears, I’ve just started my medical journey and I have the same doubts. It’s very common, I think, to feel that way. Just remember that you can be trans without meds, and there’s no minimum bar for being trans. I know it’s easy to feel those facts are fine for others but don’t apply to yourself, if you’re anything like me, at least. Maybe find some trans women to watch on YouTube? I’ve found watching other trans people and hearing their points of view has really helped me. Good luck! 🫂

      • Domi@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
        5·
        1 month ago

        Thank you for the kind words <3. I’m going to be okay. I reached out for therapy a couple of weeks ago and I now have a cool and wise older trans lady for a therapist that I can talk to about all of this. I really appreciate your words still.

    • Grail@multiverse.soulism.netEnglish
      3·
      1 month ago

      Don’t worry, almost every body has the ability to respond to estrogen, even cis people’s bodies. There are only five documented people who couldn’t process it.