A still from the movie Demolition Man in which some police officers prepare to confront a character played by Wesley Snipes.
Top Text: Demolition Man: A movie which depicts a horrifying dystopia…
Bottom Text:…in which food is too healthy, bidets are common, and cops literally don’t know how to assault a black man.
But like… how? If I try to dry my ass with toilet paper I don’t get dry and get toilet paper flakes everywhere.
I would love to understand the mechanics of this. Is it different paper?
Listen I’m not here to explain to you how to properly clean your ass, especially when you are imagining a world where you can tell a bidet user by their wet ass mark.
No, my anxiety is that I can’t properly dry my ass which will leave a wet spot. And nobody ever explains to me how they avoid it.
How does toilet paper drying an ass use less when anytime I try to wipe my ass when it’s wet - after a shower, after being in the pool, etc - it’s a pain in the ass and I end up using more. Toilet paper doesn’t remove water, and just shreds itself. Do I need a blow dryer? Is there some special paper? What happens in a public bathroom with their cheap-ass paper?
What I do know is I’m not dropping a couple hundred bucks to find out that there isn’t actually a solution and I just sort of sit there for fifteen minutes waiting for my ass to dry.
But it’s cool, I’ll just continue in my worldview because I’m not worth the trouble.