most of the instances I could find were filled with liberal centrists who call themselves leftist, and hate actual theory-reading commies.
something politically like lemmy.ml or even like lemmygrad would be perfect.
it also shouldn’t be heavily defederated against
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This is still nonsense, though. Communists absolutely value the lives of others, we seek to collectivize production and distribution so as to meet the needs of everyone. The fact that you think this in any way comparable to genocidal fascism calls your own views into serious question.
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Communists don’t oppose using force against fascists, nor do liberals oppose using force against communists. It isn’t simply “murdering opposition,” communists support revolution against capitalism and fascism, and support protecting the gains of socialism, while fascists and liberals support using violence to protect the profits of the few.