Yeah so it turns out that basically the entire field of cyber security is 95% a complete joke.

As evidenced by everything gets hacked all the fucking time and massive data breaches are so commonplace they’re usually barely newsworthy.

There of course are a small number of people who can actually oversee/implement reasonably secure code development, but, well, that costs money and takes time, but it does not cost anywhere near as much money or time to just confidently lie to people and pretend you know what you’re doing.

Governments tend to just defer to “industry experts”, which basically means ‘big dumb idiot corporation that verifies their robustness via a human centipede of paid consultants’.

Bonus awkward points if they’re still wearing their Members Only jacket and still think that is very cool.

Well I would say ‘pocket rocket’… but that’s … at least as far I know, usually/often connotes a dog’s dick…

Uh…

Yep guess I’m outta cock slang.

Joystick

Huh! It never occurred to me that there would be other funny/cute nicknames for them in other languages, but… duh, obviously, of course there would be.

Neat!

What about…

Tripod

Ole’ Faithful

Emergency Coat Hanger

Meatrod

Dingus

… ?

Before us millenials had our own take at inventing initialisms and proto emojis…

Beepers. Pagers.

A fair number of different kinds of ‘codes’ became at least somewhat widely used as shorthand for more semantically complex things, and they had even smaller character limits.

https://www.wikihow.com/Pager-Codes

Now I was like 5 when pagers were all the rage, so I have no personal experience with these, but this was arguably the gen x version of millenials who spent too much time on computers as children coming up with ‘gtfo’ and ‘lmao’ and ‘rofl’ and such.

Same.

‘haha’ is more polite/cordial, more passive and may indicate essentially nervous laughter

‘lol’ is more blunt/informal, more aggressive and may potentially indicate mockery

KIROV REPORTING

KIROV REPORTING

KIROV REPORTING

I genuienly appreciate the explanation, that makes sense.

2 reasons unc here sees them similarly:

A ) I barely ever use emojis

Many millennials grew up using

*-*

=D

:<

0.0

>=[

… style constructions to represent emotions / facial expressions in text.

I’m used to those, I’m not used to emojis.

B ) I’m just actually slowly losing visual acuity.

I’m getting oooollldddd.

I’ve got an astigmatism now, and I tend to only wear my glasses when I absolutely need to.

So I have to squint or put on my glasses to make out variations in emojis, sometimes.

At the very least, this man needs a gofundme or something, to get him a more badass eye patch.

sigh

Ok, I’ll get Afroman on the phone.

Also, I hate you.

I genuinely do not know, but I keep running into that, where they just use the crying emoji and they tell me it means they’re laughing so hard they cried (not literally of course but w/e)… even though there actually is a laughing-crying emoji.

I’m going to yell at clouds tiktok, its probably cloud’s tiktok’s fault, somehow.

EDIT:

like, I tell a joke, they respond with a crying emoji, I am confused and apologetic because I think I hurt their feelings and they are just sad crying… nope.

Nope they actually liked the joke.

This has happened to me a number of times in the last 6-9 months, with different people.

I keep seeing zoomers use this and it keeps confusing the shit out of me, because half the time, it just looks like crying, not laughing-crying.

Maybe they’re just bad at it and using the wrong emoji half the time? idfk

Am millenial, I’ve used both lol and haha, since… I dunno, 1996?

I distinctly remember the first time I accidentally said ‘lol’ outloud, as a single syllable, at the end of a sentence.

Its ok to just laugh in someone’s face and call them an uneducated idiot, who has no idea what they’re talking about.

You know how just can ban/block morons on social media, so you don’t have to hear from them any more?

You do can that in real life too.

… Has anyone attempted to turn an old android smart phone into a router?

Yeah, ding ding ding, this answer.

I know you’re joking, but I’m not.

No no no.

Not her.

Not Margot Robie.

… Her.

Olivia Thrilby.

It’s only fitting for her to get a movie where she’s the one behind a helmet this time.

Tell me she would not be a perfect fit as Samus.

You can’t.