It’s not treating your heart like a commodity, it’s more treating your whole self as something that others won’t automatically see the value in. And you have to do it because they don’t. Every human is unique and of immeasurable value and all that, but also nobody is bothering checking everyone when looking for new people. So you have to put your best and most desirable qualities forward, make people interested enough to see more and so when they start to see your worse qualities they have better qualities to make them feel like you’re still worth their interest.
If I’m out at a bar, dressed in something attractive, putting out some playful charm, engaging in interesting discussions, and generally being fun to be around, people are going to be thinking about me as a hot chick who they might be interested in. Alternatively, if I’m sitting in the corner, too awkward to talk much, overly focused on unpleasant topics, and kinda a slob, the fact that people deserve love isn’t going to make anyone interested in giving it to me.
the radar is easy:
insecure timid straight men overwhelmingly don’t get laid.
for some reason presenting confidence is the main enabler.
some physical features reduce the pool, but never entirely.
think of all the short fat bald men with beautiful partners. they are never ever insecure and shy
this is likely something they are ashamed of and they would like to keep it private
they don’t know their “condition” is painfully obvious to most people with minimal interaction required.
owning it is the only way, no need for shame either
but if they knew how to sell themselves better, they wouldn’t be in that situation in the frist place
“Sell themselves better.”
I dunno if my asexual is showing, but why would someone need to treat their heart like a commodity to find love?
It’s not treating your heart like a commodity, it’s more treating your whole self as something that others won’t automatically see the value in. And you have to do it because they don’t. Every human is unique and of immeasurable value and all that, but also nobody is bothering checking everyone when looking for new people. So you have to put your best and most desirable qualities forward, make people interested enough to see more and so when they start to see your worse qualities they have better qualities to make them feel like you’re still worth their interest.
If I’m out at a bar, dressed in something attractive, putting out some playful charm, engaging in interesting discussions, and generally being fun to be around, people are going to be thinking about me as a hot chick who they might be interested in. Alternatively, if I’m sitting in the corner, too awkward to talk much, overly focused on unpleasant topics, and kinda a slob, the fact that people deserve love isn’t going to make anyone interested in giving it to me.
Because he’s insecure about it? Or do you have a virgin-radar
the radar is easy: insecure timid straight men overwhelmingly don’t get laid.
for some reason presenting confidence is the main enabler. some physical features reduce the pool, but never entirely. think of all the short fat bald men with beautiful partners. they are never ever insecure and shy