My dad used to do this with toast. He’d wake up 2 hours before me, make toast, and then let it sit inside the toaster after it popped up. For 2 hours.

Then when I came down, he’d pull them out, and place a square of cold butter in the center of the toast.

I’m like “I’ll just make the toast myself”, and he was like “no! You’re 8 years old! You’re not allowed”.

I’m 42 now. We don’t talk anymore. I see him at holidays, but yeah. Just one example of all the reasons he can fuck off.