Ok, well, in that case, I’ll take three mega bogus burgers with the twist melt nine times outta six, as well as a side of cheese fries, freaked not fried, and two cokes, one with cocaine in it the other diet, and if you could blend all that up and put it in my smoothie from this morning, I would be peaches, you crabcake dudzoltzer, you.
I got the least serious bollocking of my life from the manager of the bar I worked in when the exec team of the bar I worked in bought me 12 jagerbombs in a single shift
Remember this scene in Ratatouille where Colette talks about the sordid pasts of the kitchen staff? Now consider that that was bowdlerized for a kids’ movie, compared to reality.
Shakespeare’s work has a lot of dirty jokes, they’re just made with terminology modern English speakers don’t know or don’t realize was dirty back then.
And some of his lines are overt even to people today, like “What, with my tongue in your tail?” or when he uses a character named Bottom to make a lot of double entendres.
You know what’s going to be asked next, so here’s the response:
“Sorry homie, I’ve been drinking”
Actually used this once, and it wasn’t a lie or stretching the truth
Good call, never lie to your boss. Crack open a cold one as soon as the first text comes in
After. Just been drinking after.
“If you need extra hire, a friend is looking for a job, I could get you in touch”
In my restaurant there’s a four drink minimum before you can start cooking or serving customers.
In my restaurant, I make all my female employees withstand uncomfortable sexual advances from me. I have lawsuits out the ass!
Sounds like you should go to jail.
Nah, I’m allowed to do this, write funny comments on the internet, because I am the police, retard
Your credentials check out continue on.
Ok, well, in that case, I’ll take three mega bogus burgers with the twist melt nine times outta six, as well as a side of cheese fries, freaked not fried, and two cokes, one with cocaine in it the other diet, and if you could blend all that up and put it in my smoothie from this morning, I would be peaches, you crabcake dudzoltzer, you.
I got the least serious bollocking of my life from the manager of the bar I worked in when the exec team of the bar I worked in bought me 12 jagerbombs in a single shift
How much coke was involved?
for us plebs sadly none
12 jagerbombs and no coke is a war crime.
And no maximum?
Most people find their own maximum.
Some find it and just leave it faaaar behind them
Remember this scene in Ratatouille where Colette talks about the sordid pasts of the kitchen staff? Now consider that that was bowdlerized for a kids’ movie, compared to reality.
TIL “bowdlerize” https://www.englishgrammar.org/bowdlerize-means-sanitize-book/
what a prude, that Thomas Bowdler. Shakespeare was too spicy for him!
Shakespeare’s work has a lot of dirty jokes, they’re just made with terminology modern English speakers don’t know or don’t realize was dirty back then.
And some of his lines are overt even to people today, like “What, with my tongue in your tail?” or when he uses a character named Bottom to make a lot of double entendres.
“My grandma died…”