I wasn’t sure myself why the title was gendered the way it was in relation the image. I still haven’t figured out the connection there amongst all the accusations of misandry being thrown at me.
I’ve mainly heard said by a person about herself, or from one woman to another, often as a way to make a joke of the sort that implied that they thought whatever task it was (that required the big girl pants) was big and difficult while acknowledging that it actually is not, e.g. “I put on my big girl pants and rang the council to tell them I need a new recycling bin”
There’s a difference depending on who it is coming from. Another woman using the word “bitch” for example is different than a man calling a woman a “bitch”.
When a man is telling a woman to use her “big girl words”, it is problematic. This meme is not showing that it is being used in a light-hearted way. This is punching down.
I think it’s uncharitable to assume that, and the risk of assuming the best is tiny, whilst the risk of assuming the worst is everyone getting angry with each other for no reason. I don’t know if OP is a man and I don’t want to go checking every user’s gender before deciding what I think about what they’ve said, and even if I did, I think there are situations where men can make the same light-hearted jokes as women - whether it’s ok depends on a lot more than that.
That’s more or less what I’d assumed you meant initially, but I similarly wasn’t going to assume that without checking, because launching into an argument based on an assumption of what you meant could just lead to you getting angry with me, whilst the risk of me challenging my own assumption and waiting to see carried only the risk that I’d never know.
I had commented to open the conversation, I’m not sure if you clocked that I didn’t respond in anger at all in this thread. I got closed off after a certain user started attacking me. I was more curious WHY OP used that title than anything, like why gender this? For what reason? What is the message being sent here?
But again, everyone assumed what I meant in my initial comment and here we are.
I still think OP used a problematic expression in a negative way, but they haven’t graced us with a comment clarifying and I have people up my ass calling me a misandrist.
I wasn’t sure myself why the title was gendered the way it was in relation the image. I still haven’t figured out the connection there amongst all the accusations of misandry being thrown at me.
Thanks.
If I had to guess (lots of guessing) it’s like supposed to be a light-hearted expression like “big girl pants”
Is telling a woman to put on her “big girl pants” light-hearted?
All the times I have heard it said, which is not that many, yes. It was said in a light-hearted and, dare I say, kind way :)
The times it’s been said to me have been condescending and meant to shame.
For the record, telling a grown woman to “use her big girl words” or put on her “big girl pants” is incredibly rude.
That sounds unpleasant.
I’ve mainly heard said by a person about herself, or from one woman to another, often as a way to make a joke of the sort that implied that they thought whatever task it was (that required the big girl pants) was big and difficult while acknowledging that it actually is not, e.g. “I put on my big girl pants and rang the council to tell them I need a new recycling bin”
There’s a difference depending on who it is coming from. Another woman using the word “bitch” for example is different than a man calling a woman a “bitch”.
When a man is telling a woman to use her “big girl words”, it is problematic. This meme is not showing that it is being used in a light-hearted way. This is punching down.
I think it’s uncharitable to assume that, and the risk of assuming the best is tiny, whilst the risk of assuming the worst is everyone getting angry with each other for no reason. I don’t know if OP is a man and I don’t want to go checking every user’s gender before deciding what I think about what they’ve said, and even if I did, I think there are situations where men can make the same light-hearted jokes as women - whether it’s ok depends on a lot more than that.
That’s more or less what I’d assumed you meant initially, but I similarly wasn’t going to assume that without checking, because launching into an argument based on an assumption of what you meant could just lead to you getting angry with me, whilst the risk of me challenging my own assumption and waiting to see carried only the risk that I’d never know.
I’ve had discussions with OP before.
I had commented to open the conversation, I’m not sure if you clocked that I didn’t respond in anger at all in this thread. I got closed off after a certain user started attacking me. I was more curious WHY OP used that title than anything, like why gender this? For what reason? What is the message being sent here?
But again, everyone assumed what I meant in my initial comment and here we are.
I still think OP used a problematic expression in a negative way, but they haven’t graced us with a comment clarifying and I have people up my ass calling me a misandrist.