Eons ago now, in my youth, WalMart used to be open 24 hours a day, making it a viable option for hanging out late and observing other local weirdos. One night, around midnight, a group of much younger kids were there, running around and being loud and making a mess and generally threatening to “ruin it for everybody.” When they ran past us at full speed, narrowly missing my friend, she muttered under her breath, “Fall. Fall. FALL!” And in that very instant one of them tripped and face-planted in the middle of the aisle in the women’s clothing section, very nearly going full scorpion. We would have laughed otherwise, but we were both eyes-wide in amazement at my friend’s newly discovered magic powers. The end.
Not even late night but a young kid was standing in the cart screaming about something and all the mom did was yell at them telling them to stop, while the kid was Stomping around. I was just NOPING OUT of the section when the mom shoves the cart, lo and behold the kid shifted to the end and ragdolled out. Thr only saving grace was they were in the clothing section which was carpeted so the kid just kidnapped bounced.
Why do people hate kids playing? Legit question?
I don’t hate kids. I hate the parents who bring under 10 kids to a brewery, the kids pull 5 board games out at once, dump them on a table then leave it there and go run up and down the corn hole boards screaming and throwing the bags at each other while mommy and daddy get sloshed.
Idk why you go to bar where kids are allowed but ok
Children play outside, in a gym, on a playground, in their own house, not in a restaurant, nor a library, or a theater, etc. I’m trying to enjoy my personal time and space too.
You haven’t been to a library lately. Kids do play there. Kids play anywhere. If the situation is adult then don’t bring your kids but if it’s family allowed, then maybe you shouldn’t be in those spaces. Both are allowed.
We don’t. We hate shitty parents.
More specifically: neglectful parents
Judging by not letting your kids play, ya you are…
Then why be happy when a child hurts themself?
Because 1. they then stop being annoying to everyone for a while, and 2. they instantly become the shitty parents’ problem. I do feel bad for them for the pain, but my personal relief that the noise is stopping outweighs that.
Also they may learn a lesson from it about not being so physically active in places not suitable for it. Some lessons for some people can only be learned the hard way.
… In a restaurant?
Playplace? It’s literally in the name…
I remember a child who started screaming. The child was in a stroller and the setting was a retail shop. The mother looked at the child, looked back at the sales person, and just continued talking with them, completely ignoring the screaming baby / infant / child.
Fuck you. You might be used to it, but don’t make it our problem. Soothe your kid or remove them from the store. I’m not here to listen to your kid scream.
they are too busy doomscrolling or texting on thier phones to notice thier child.
when I say parents should have a licence to have each kid is that what I mean.
Ah yes. Take it out on the children instead of the incapable parents who shouldn’t have got them in the first place.
Seriously. You need to be a psychopath sack of shit to take joy in a kid getting hurt, regardless of the situation.
Not quite what’s being described here - the waiter’s done nothing and most likely would not be fast enough to prevent the situation from happening. It just happened.
That being said, this would be a very fucked up reaction to a kid most likely dying if it were real life - however,( missed the last part where the little shit’s fine) most of us understand this is just hyperbole for the sake of dark humor, and not to be taken seriously.Children do not die from hitting a corner of a table. There would be very few people in the world if that were even remotely true.
… and more importantly it says they start crying at the tail end which i neglected to read.
You think banging their head and falling is going to result in them “most likely dying”?
You have some strange ideas about how mortal kids are.
Hitting one’s head off the corner of a table has in fact been enough to kill folks, yes. You’d be surprised to learn how goddamn little it takes to kill someone by accident.
It’s possible but not “most likely”. Humanity would not have survived if we died every time we bumped our head.
Especially if the kid “started crying” after, they’re probably fine.
I’m also always happy when someone’s child gets hurt because their parents deserve it…/s
That’s the joke. First face is happy. Second face is not actually happy because the situation has begun to set in.
the last time I went to my favorite burger place, not a fast food chain, a local place, owner operated. Some shitty little kid was running around the booths screaming.
There’s a homeless camp very close by that place and when I tried to warn the mom that homeless, sometimes drunk and/or high homeless people go in there she calmly but angrily told me “don’t tell me how to parent my kids”
not long after that a homeless lady came in there looking around the booths for any forgotten items to steal, the stupid lady still didn’t wrangle her kid to stay near her
I used to be homeless, and the worst thing that the other homeless people ever did to Me is that a crazy guy kept asking Me to help him build a time machine. Homeless people are mostly very sweet and nice.
Imagine passing up a chance to kill baby Hitler and buy Bitcoin in 2010 because you’re too busy “trying to get your life together.”
It’s crazy that the first thing a lot of people would do with a time machine is use it to kill an infant.
Just needed some art lessons.
I know, what a fool I was! I learned to play the piano and went to job interviews like a moron!
“Homeless person asks me to help them build a time machine” is almost as sad of a short story as “babyshoes for sell. Never worn.”
He kept asking the shelter kitchen staff when I’d be in the cafeteria for lunch so he could pitch Me on his time UFO idea. He believed that two disks rotating in opposite directions would create infinite energy and unlock time travel.
And I told him that it’s not a UFO if you’ve identified it, it’s a flying saucer. And I don’t think the scientific principle at play is valid. He told Me to watch a conspiracy documentary that proves it is valid.
Oh no, the homeless?! 😱 Did they staggered while walking and shouted cccooooooiiiiiins, at least in your head?
Good thing you were looking out for that child.
Imagine the terrible lessons that child is going to learn growing up, crazy shit like “homeless people aren’t a threat” and “dont get bullied by random dudes lecturing you in public”
Don’t worry, the mother had an eye on the kid. That creepy guy named Zeus won’t be able to do a thing.
