You’ve considered a capitalist solution, but have you considered
Restorative justice: the spider is a trespasser, but will likely not find enough prey to survive. Capture the spider and relocate it to a suitable habitat where it can thrive. Check on it occasionally to ensure it is doing well
Libertarian anarchism: leave it be. It will die, survive, or thrive on its own terms
Authoritarianism: tell the spider if it doesn’t remove itself it will be arrested, start ordering it to get on the ground, fire 13 rounds at it, preferably missing all shots but hitting a nearby toddler. Institute martial law against the “foreign threat”, citing the recent death of a toddler
Sure, though my comment wasn’t strictly a rebuttal to yours. It was as much an FYI to anyone who stumbled across our comments and has relocated spiders outside out of a desire to save them.
I’m glad you posted your original comment. I tend to be pretty tongue-in-cheek, both online and IRL. Sorry if it comes off as abrasive, in my mind it’s all in good fun. Love you and hope you have a fantastic day <3
This little heartfelt, wholesome back and forth between you two was exactly the medicine that I needed to calm my nerves after I unintentionally started what seems to have become the shitstorm of the ages over at linux@lemmy.ml . May all the spiders of the universe have mercy on my soul.
SirSamuel, you enlightened bastard! You don’t know how much I needed this laugh.
Also, I decided to go the pre-Marxist socialist route: the spider is allowed to stay and to contribute according to its abilities and shall be compensated according to its contributions in the pest elimination field.
You’ve considered a capitalist solution, but have you considered
Restorative justice: the spider is a trespasser, but will likely not find enough prey to survive. Capture the spider and relocate it to a suitable habitat where it can thrive. Check on it occasionally to ensure it is doing well
Libertarian anarchism: leave it be. It will die, survive, or thrive on its own terms
Authoritarianism: tell the spider if it doesn’t remove itself it will be arrested, start ordering it to get on the ground, fire 13 rounds at it, preferably missing all shots but hitting a nearby toddler. Institute martial law against the “foreign threat”, citing the recent death of a toddler
House spiders generally don’t survive outdoors. They’re cave-dwelling species and they seek out indoor spaces by instinct.
This is a very good point. In rebuttal
A. I did say “a suitable habitat”
B. I was very clearly shitposting
Sure, though my comment wasn’t strictly a rebuttal to yours. It was as much an FYI to anyone who stumbled across our comments and has relocated spiders outside out of a desire to save them.
I’m glad you posted your original comment. I tend to be pretty tongue-in-cheek, both online and IRL. Sorry if it comes off as abrasive, in my mind it’s all in good fun. Love you and hope you have a fantastic day <3
No worries! People can be both amused and informed!
This little heartfelt, wholesome back and forth between you two was exactly the medicine that I needed to calm my nerves after I unintentionally started what seems to have become the shitstorm of the ages over at linux@lemmy.ml . May all the spiders of the universe have mercy on my soul.
SirSamuel, you enlightened bastard! You don’t know how much I needed this laugh.
Also, I decided to go the pre-Marxist socialist route: the spider is allowed to stay and to contribute according to its abilities and shall be compensated according to its contributions in the pest elimination field.