Opinions will vary here, but I like when the reminiscing comes after the request. If we catch up after talking to each other out of the blue, then you ask me for a favour, I tend to think that we only caught up because you felt obliged to do so to butter me up. It could be viewed as manipulative.
Bonus points if you ask me for a favour and I say I can’t right now, but you still take the time to catch up. That’s a pretty strong signal that you view the relationship as more than transactional. It also means I’m more likely to change my mind about doing that favour.
Opinions will vary here, but I like when the reminiscing comes after the request. If we catch up after talking to each other out of the blue, then you ask me for a favour, I tend to think that we only caught up because you felt obliged to do so to butter me up. It could be viewed as manipulative.
Bonus points if you ask me for a favour and I say I can’t right now, but you still take the time to catch up. That’s a pretty strong signal that you view the relationship as more than transactional. It also means I’m more likely to change my mind about doing that favour.
That’s fine too.
It’s just when someone asks you for help and disappears that I hate. Like your only worth is TOS problem and they’re done with you now