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nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.de to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 day ago

The timeline after the Harambe Incident

discuss.tchncs.de

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The timeline after the Harambe Incident

discuss.tchncs.de

nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.de to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 day ago
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  • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world
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    17 minutes ago

    Is there a source for the full timeline???

    • nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.deOP
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      15 minutes ago

      Couldn’t find it.

      • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world
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        14 minutes ago

        Thanks for trying! 😁

  • Abyssian@lemmy.world
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    51 minutes ago

    Does the lower point after the split say “Tide POC”?

  • TouchMacaque@lemmy.ca
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    1 day ago

    My neighbor’s wife’s dog’s previous owner’s dental assistant’s husband somehow did the jump between timelines and told us about the timeline where Harambe didn’t get murdered.

    It’s not at all what you’d expect, in the other timeline some Elvis impersonator from Vegas became president in the 2016 and his first order of business was to order ICE to detain all Beatles fans and deport them to England. The cost of the operation bankrupted the nation and for some reason everyone blamed Harambe. A crowd of 2500 people marched to the zoo and lynched Harambe. Doing so resulted in an economic boom but also released some sort of respiratory virus that spread worldwide and caused millions of deaths. A few years later that guy from the apprentice became president and the timelines converged into the same situation we have now.

    In the end nothing changed except all the Beatles fans are in England now and they prevented Brexit so I guess that’s pretty cool.

    • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world
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      2 hours ago

      Might argue their timeline is worse then - that’s 3 terms of trumpism rather than just 2

      • Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world
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        1 hour ago

        Its pretty good for the UK though.

    • arrow74@lemmy.zip
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      16 hours ago

      And now we know how many people a gorilla can fight off

      • numberskull@lemmy.zip
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        1 hour ago

        It’s a shame the gorilla couldn’t beat off everybody

    • coolie4@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      In the end nothing changed except all the Beatles fans are in England now and they prevented Brexit so I guess that’s pretty cool.

      Didn’t I read something recently saying they were trying to get back in the EU?

      • TouchMacaque@lemmy.ca
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        1 day ago

        I’m not sure, did you?

        • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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          1 hour ago

          Well I have, now.

  • Ioughttamow@fedia.io
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    1 day ago

    Ah, just rebase the good timeline onto the harambe branch

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 hour ago

      $ sudo rpm-ostree rebase -b fedora/stable/harambe

      $ sudo systemctl reboot

    • macniel@feddit.org
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      1 day ago

      good luck rebasing 600 billion commits.

      • humorlessrepost@lemmy.world
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        15 hours ago

        Caude, resolve my conflicts and push to prod branch.

        • bluesheep@sh.itjust.works
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          1 hour ago

          Great job it just deleted the repo. We do have backups, right?

  • FauxPseudo @lemmy.world
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    22 hours ago

    It all started December 26th 2015. Lemmy died. Two weeks later David Bowie died. Lemmy’s death ripped a hole in the universe. The year of celebrity deaths started. Harambe died. Trump became president. It almost stared the day after Christmas 2025. That’s where it all went wrong.

  • village604@adultswim.fan
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    21 hours ago

    The world actually ended in 2012. We’re just in hell now.

    • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world
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      15 minutes ago

      Though I don’t believe in rapture (it’s not even in the bible, it’s just a new idea from American Christians) it does often feel like we’re the ones “left behind”

  • macniel@feddit.org
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    1 day ago

    is it a shitpost because its not the entire timeline?

    • nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.deOP
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      1 day ago

      Yes, funni

  • arandomthought@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    Oh god, we truly are in the tide pod branch, are we?

  • cattywampas@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    But the Cubs won a World Series, so, worth it.

    • Hozerkiller@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      In the other timeline they win 3 back to back to back.

  • fleem@piefed.zeromedia.vip
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    1 day ago

    we shoulda been on that line to the D

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