Hi all. As this is the internet, I’m sure I’m going to get backlash and negative comments about me personally (“you were never REALLY vegan”), but before you do that please know this post is coming from someone struggling with a lot of things beyond just this and is legit looking for help.

I’ve been vegan for 6 years now (for the animals and for the environment). During that time I have never knowingly consumed any kind of animal products be it food or otherwise. I always felt I was doing the right thing for me and strongly felt the need to reduce harm that I inflict as a human consumer. I struggle with self-esteem so I always figured “I’m a piece of shit, why should anything have to suffer to sustain me?” I should note I also live in a very VERY rural area and I’m the only vegan I personally know both locally and anywhere else.

Lately I’ve been struggling with my conviction when it comes to being vegan. I see all the horrible things in this world. How no one seems to care for anything other than themselves these days. Humans can’t even treat each other with basic decency let alone animals. All humans seem to do is destroy the environment so they can google something faster or generate some slop that looks the same as all the rest. So why should I even bother anymore? Buy that leather belt, eat that chicken. Baseline decency is no longer needed it seems, why go further?

I guess what I’m saying is the world is shit and most of the people in it seem to be as well. Why should I care about harm reduction anymore? If the status quo is to treat everything and everyone like shit, then what’s the point anymore?

When I play it forward in my mind, the thought of actually consuming animal products makes me physically ill, but I feel like I’m thinking about it more and more and the time it takes for me to get to that nausea takes longer and longer. And that is what truly worries me.

I hate that I’m starting to not care about others anymore, and frankly could use a caring ear and words.

EDIT: Thank you for the advice and encouragement all. I know this is something I’m going to struggle with for some time, but I’m bookmarking this to come back to your reminders about why I do this. Whether that reason is compassion or spite. Both work depending on the day. I am grateful for you all.

  • Jarix@lemmy.worldEnglish
    1·
    3 hours ago

    Let me first say, I’m not vegetarian in anyway, but I also don’t have hate for those who are different from me.

    It’s okay to feel like you are alone on an island.

    That it’s pointless to maintain your values.

    It’s okay if you fail to uphold them sometimes.

    We aren’t and never will be perfect creatures.

    We can only try to do better today than we did yesterday because we can’t change yesterday.

    You may be alone but you may also be the reason that someone else in your area considers or even becomes vegan one day.

    You may be alone but you can still be an example to everyone around you.

    You will never know the totality of the effect you have on the world around you.

    I gave up fast food burgers 25 years ago, sometimes it felt completely pointless.

    But Im still going, what kept me going was that how rare is it going to be, to be able to say I haven’t had fast food on 50 years.

    It’s a meaningless accomplishment, but it does no harm to anyone else, it allows me to stay true to myself even if only in this one way.

    You will never know when you will inspire someone else simply by being who you are, but you will, you may have already.

    And if you ever find yourself in Quebec City, visit Don Vegan. The citie’s first vegan only restaurant. They certainly had a hard time in that community but they are still there. And have the Thai Soup, one of the best soups I’ve ever had and that’s from someone who eats meat.

    I personally feel like vegetarian and by extension vegans, are doing the world a favour by inventing new ways to get flavour out of foods and trying new things that we all can enjoy. In the end flavour is going to win against ideology, make the best food you can invent and if it supplants meat based alternatives simply because it tastes better we all win

    Good luck out there, I’m glad you seem to have found some helpful advice already