I had a conversation with a guy at a gay bar years ago and we chatted about hearing these comments a lot because we didn’t act camp or have “that voice”, and weren’t seen as LGBT at all by a lot of people unless it came up. Turned out he was the owner of the place and had been active in setting up the LGBT+ scene there for decades but still had this happen.
Is that a bad thing? Knowing if you’re gay or not in casual conversation is weird. It just means you guys are normal ass dudes who happen to have a different sexual preference, it isn’t like some crazy defining factor or your life.
I think media pushes this narrative that unless you’re covered in rainbow shit 24/7 and acting flamboyant you’re secretly ashamed or something, which is total bullshit.
My mom is 73 and just married a woman 3 months ago, after being married to my dad for 25 years and being single for like 15 years. She definitely isn’t ashamed because people don’t instantly know she’s gay, nor does she care. She owns a few pride things and that’s about it. Because she’s a normal woman who happens to have a different sexual preference. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being “normal” and gay.
![Ahem [TinyBaer]](https://slrpnk.net/pictrs/image/a37867aa-4f71-41c1-bfb9-99daf214539e.webp){kind=link}
I had a conversation with a guy at a gay bar years ago and we chatted about hearing these comments a lot because we didn’t act camp or have “that voice”, and weren’t seen as LGBT at all by a lot of people unless it came up. Turned out he was the owner of the place and had been active in setting up the LGBT+ scene there for decades but still had this happen.
Is that a bad thing? Knowing if you’re gay or not in casual conversation is weird. It just means you guys are normal ass dudes who happen to have a different sexual preference, it isn’t like some crazy defining factor or your life.
I think media pushes this narrative that unless you’re covered in rainbow shit 24/7 and acting flamboyant you’re secretly ashamed or something, which is total bullshit.
My mom is 73 and just married a woman 3 months ago, after being married to my dad for 25 years and being single for like 15 years. She definitely isn’t ashamed because people don’t instantly know she’s gay, nor does she care. She owns a few pride things and that’s about it. Because she’s a normal woman who happens to have a different sexual preference. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being “normal” and gay.
Its hard to take off a mask youve been wearing for decades.