I used to work for Cisco as a programmer, and when I got laid off by them I found out that my mom thought I had been working for Sysco the whole time. She had never understood why I was working for a food services company, although I expect they employ a large number of programmers too.

Did working for Cisco suck? I can’t say as I never did a lick of actual work for them. They acquired my original company and then we all sat around for a fucking year doing nothing until they laid most of us off. Weirdly, everybody who got laid off was childless – the only people from my original company who were kept on had one or more children. I don’t know what to make of that.

My only regret is not saying that my work macbook had been stolen. That’s what all of my coworkers did and they all ended up with free macbooks.