I would prefer to find an operating system I can support that is developed by people who are generally kind, however I find the behavior of many of the top Linux/*BSD devs to be… abhorrent.
Are there any real alternatives that are led by nicer people?
You’re kidding, right?
People are people, we all get to be assholes at least occasionally.
People who are experts at this kind of level often don’t have great social skills. That’s just how it works - in every field.