yep. also like… has this person been in a relationship?
my exes loved it when I was a raging asshole to other people. they hate it when I was nice to them. it was morally repulsive to me how ‘hot’ it made them. they loved impulse to anger and violence, and were ‘turned off’ it when i was reasonable and calm. because people calm and kind isn’t ‘strong’ or ‘manly’.
sadly a lot of people are driven by biological/cultural defaults, and one of those men must be violent and hostile to prove their ability to ‘protect’ the women/children. and they look down on more socially benevolent behaviors.
Idk, I think you just have bad taste. I don’t know any people like that, women or otherwise. Maybe you attract shitty people for some reason? Maybe it’s your attitude and behaviors? Can’t be sure, I don’t know you. But it’s worth consideration! I find being nice to people usually results in them being nice to me. It’s almost like that should be some kind of special rule we teach toddlers, it could be so valuable. I’d go so far as to say that rule would be as valuable as gold…
Have you considered that the way you generally behaved around people created a selection pressure in your dating pool? If you behave like an asshole in public you will only attract people who are turned on by or at least accepting of asshole-ish behavior.
That guy is one of the best example of toxic masculinity I’ve seen on lemmy. He’s swallowed the manosphere BS whole hog. It only takes a few minutes looking through his profile to understand why he’s single in his 40s.
I’ve run into him a few times before and he’s always like that. I gave him the below advice, he completely ignored me and continues to parrot that kind of misogynistic language.
I’ve noticed your complaints up and down this thread, I’ve also noticed them around the threadiverse for a while and I am beginning to see a pattern. You tend to be aggressively argumentative, denigrate women as a whole/complain about “woke”, refuse to see things from other people’s perspectives, and don’t listen to anyone’s advice. Have you ever heard the phrase “if everyone around you is an asshole, then maybe you’re the asshole”? Perhaps part of the issue is your behavior and attitude.
This is leftover from hunter gatherer humans who want the fucking crazy ass murderer in their tribe to kill the other tribes, and won’t kill you if you appease him with women.
Evolutionary psychology and anthropology do not support this conceptualization. Hunter gatherer societies were egalitarian and survived on cooperation. If one member was violent and/or seen as relatively unpredictable they were simply left behind (ostracized) or killed by the rest of the tribe (capital punishment).
In fact, some evolutionary biologists believe this collective culling of highly aggressive individuals over tens of thousands of years actually self-domesticated humans, making our species naturally more cooperative and less prone to random internal violence.
This is what anthropologists refer to as a reverse dominance hierarchy ie. the individual attempting to dominate would be culled while the cooperative collective was the truly dominant force. It’s, in a way, a precivilizational form of democracy.
One has to wonder if we’ve forgotten these ancient corrective mechanisms.
yep. also like… has this person been in a relationship?
my exes loved it when I was a raging asshole to other people. they hate it when I was nice to them. it was morally repulsive to me how ‘hot’ it made them. they loved impulse to anger and violence, and were ‘turned off’ it when i was reasonable and calm. because people calm and kind isn’t ‘strong’ or ‘manly’.
sadly a lot of people are driven by biological/cultural defaults, and one of those men must be violent and hostile to prove their ability to ‘protect’ the women/children. and they look down on more socially benevolent behaviors.
You need to meet better people, wtf.
Idk, I think you just have bad taste. I don’t know any people like that, women or otherwise. Maybe you attract shitty people for some reason? Maybe it’s your attitude and behaviors? Can’t be sure, I don’t know you. But it’s worth consideration! I find being nice to people usually results in them being nice to me. It’s almost like that should be some kind of special rule we teach toddlers, it could be so valuable. I’d go so far as to say that rule would be as valuable as gold…
Have you considered that the way you generally behaved around people created a selection pressure in your dating pool? If you behave like an asshole in public you will only attract people who are turned on by or at least accepting of asshole-ish behavior.
Wow this post made me so grateful for the women in my life (for not being this way).
This is much more cultural than it is biological. Protection doesn’t equate to violence outside of the extreme circumstances.
🕵️♂️
This comment so perfectly encapsulates toxic masculinity that it should have its own exhibit in a museum.
That guy is one of the best example of toxic masculinity I’ve seen on lemmy. He’s swallowed the manosphere BS whole hog. It only takes a few minutes looking through his profile to understand why he’s single in his 40s.
I’ve run into him a few times before and he’s always like that. I gave him the below advice, he completely ignored me and continues to parrot that kind of misogynistic language.
The real shame is that their take is so well upvoted, relative to the fediverse that is.
Yeah, usually his misogynistic comments like that are downvoted, sad to see that one is so highly upvoted 👎
I’m doing my part!
This is leftover from hunter gatherer humans who want the fucking crazy ass murderer in their tribe to kill the other tribes, and won’t kill you if you appease him with women.
Evolutionary psychology and anthropology do not support this conceptualization. Hunter gatherer societies were egalitarian and survived on cooperation. If one member was violent and/or seen as relatively unpredictable they were simply left behind (ostracized) or killed by the rest of the tribe (capital punishment).
In fact, some evolutionary biologists believe this collective culling of highly aggressive individuals over tens of thousands of years actually self-domesticated humans, making our species naturally more cooperative and less prone to random internal violence.
This is what anthropologists refer to as a reverse dominance hierarchy ie. the individual attempting to dominate would be culled while the cooperative collective was the truly dominant force. It’s, in a way, a precivilizational form of democracy.
One has to wonder if we’ve forgotten these ancient corrective mechanisms.
That is interesting. Sure doesn’t seem to match up one bit with humans of the last century.
I wonder why (some, most?) women are attracted to assholes then ?
Ape together strong, or some such
And which scientist or historian told you that?
No one. It seems like a plausible theory to me.
That’s because you have a very poor grasp on evolutionary biology and human history.
I guess so!