• fisch@lemmy.world
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    18 hours ago

    The funny thing about men is that most of them are terrible at flirting, but it never bothers them enough to get off their asses and figure out how it works.

    It’s not magic, it’s a skill like everything else.

    • DaGeek247@fedia.io
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      18 hours ago

      It’s a skill where fucking it up has the possible consequence of being labeled a creep, or worse. Makes it a lot harder to get into when participating could ruin your life. Many people have written off flirting / approaching in person entirely because of this.

      Note the “possible”. Fear means people are less likely to do something, not that there is some sort of assessment on the likelyhood of a risk actually happening.

      • WesternInfidels@feddit.online
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        16 hours ago

        participating could ruin your life

        I’m not going to tell you that flirting is easy or that there’s no wrong way to do it, but this is unreasonable. Hyperbolic.

      • fisch@lemmy.world
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        15 hours ago

        Many people have written off flirting / approaching in person entirely because of this.

        Giving up before even trying does not sound like a winning strategy.

      • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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        16 hours ago

        It’s not a skill arch users will teach you

        Actually since the arch user stereotype has been shifting from basement dweller to transfem polycule it may actually be one they’ll teach nowadays…

      • fisch@lemmy.world
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        15 hours ago

        How do you usually learn stuff? You could find a book on the topic and read it. Theory can’t fully replace practical experience, but it can carry you at least some of the way. Or if you’re more hands-on, you try stuff out, see how well it works (or doesn’t), and then use Google to figure out what you did wrong.

        • Jankatarch@lemmy.world
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          13 hours ago

          There are some books written for lawyers on how to make prople feel more comfortable talking to them. Criminalist Jo-Ellan Dimitrus’s “reading people” for example.