Some of us have faith in the Emperor to protect us.

Tech bros suggesting we live in a hive city is believable

if you can’t tell that this is satire maybe some time off of lemmy is warranted

The blue check mark is throwing me off.

Is your comment also satire cause idk how you can think this post isn’t

Yeah and even if it’s a joke, it’s only a matter of time before some billionaire asshole takes it seriously

You don’t want to live in a matrix-esque human pod?

exactly what i saw aswell

In fairness, you can probably keep enough whole humans to stack in there without touching and then just liquefy the rest. That should save some money and time.

That is hands down my favorite P&R moment

have you smelt my brand?

it’s had buildings cleared until they saw me and said “it’s just this guy’s farts false alarm”

Everyone gets a 1’x1’x6’ cell to luxuriate in. If my memory serves…

I think you just start pitching people in, and the compression happens naturally as the people pile up.

Good news though. Without using any math or science, my AI determined that the people at the bottom will be under enough heat and pressure to become oil, or diamonds or both. Just put a spigot at the bottom so we don’t lose that economic value in the bodies of the people we’ve systematically crushed to fund our lavish extravagant lifestyle.

It’s a sort of human pyramid meets human centipede.

I think you just walk into the fluidic solid walls, like the Homer into the bushes gif, except face first, where you are slowly enveloped by the acceptance of the warm loving collective.

Even though those are very different procedures, I fail to see how the outcome could be any different.

You’re run through a grinder to join the mega-meatball.

I believe the first step would be dehydration.

Both.

Game incoming

The Web invaded Mainframe
Sprite and virus battled side by side,
Attempting to reclaim the city
from the rift which opened wide.

But Megabyte betrayed Bob and
he threw him deep inside the pit.
The pit was closed and Bob was hosed
and all that he could say was “Nooo!”

 

Without Bob to protect us
we thought we would have no barrier,
From he who would infect us
except Enzo, which was scarier,
The city shivered terrified
from fear of the Infector’s touch…

“I guess your fear was verified, I wasn’t a protector much.”

(I guess our fear was verified, he wasn’t a protector much)
(I guess our fear was verified, he wasn’t a protector much)
(I guess our fear was verified, he wasn’t a protector^ector much)

 

It wasn’t Enzo’s fault at first
he only was a little Sprite,
At best he was the worst but then
he slowly learned to do it right,

And just as he was getting skilled
a Game came down he couldn’t win,
I thought for sure they’d both been killed,
first Bob then Enzo, not again!

(And just as he was getting skilled a Game came down he couldn’t win)
(She thought for sure they’d both been killed, first Bob then Enzo, not again!)

 

I went from Game to Game
I aged, I grew and lost my innocence,
I soon became enraged by each
and ev’ry bad experience,

The Sprite you knew was gone
I had become a grim aggressor man,
I knew from that point on
that I was truly Bob’s successor man.

(The Sprite we knew was gone, he had become a grim aggressor man)
(He knew from that point on that he was truly Bob’s successor man)

 

I met up with the Webriders
and took the form of Interface,
I joined my gun with pirate swords
and sailed the seas of cyberspace,

And when at last the pair of us
were fin’lly reunited guys,
Our shouts of joy did blare because
we really were delighted guys.

 

We soon made tracks to Mainframe
so our friends could reunite with us,
We made it back and Megabyte
was waiting there to fight with us.

When Bob went
face to face to face to face
with Hexadecimal

…his chances for survival shrank from small to infin’tesimal.

(His chances for survival shrank from small to infin’tesimal)
(His chances for survival shrank from small to infin’tesimal)
(His chances for survival shrank from small to infin’tesi^esimal)

 

Bob helped to defragment my head
while Matrix fought with Megabyte,
I thought he’d wind up dead
but Matrix put up a terrific fight.

I’d dreamed of this each lonely night
of doing in that virus trash,
But just as I had won the fight
he engineered a system crash!

(You dreamed of this each lonely night of doing in that virus trash)
(But just as you had won the fight he engineered a system crash)

 

What Megabyte had hoped to do
was cause his death to crack us up,
I gambled on the User to ReBoot
and thereby back us up.

It worked! We all were born anew
and rid of things barbaric,
And now we’re back together,
Ev’rything’s alphanumeric!

(It worked, we all were born anew and rid of things barbaric)
(And now we’re back together, ev’rything’s alphanumeric)

___And now we’re back together, EVERYTHING IS ALPHANUMERIC!!

Went too far for “Warning, incoming game.”

But it’ll take four and a half billion years to compile its model and just as it’s about to be completed the Vogons will destroy it to make way for a hyperspace bypass.

They built the Dyson sphere to exclusively power grok. The sun no longer licks the earth with its warm light. The land based datacenters on earth, now buried under hundreds of meters of ice, provide the few remaining sources of heat through their exhaust shafts. The last of the surface bound human refugees cling to them as camps and villages pop up here and there. Sustaining themselves on Jensen Huang brand “Hot Dog flavored” meat-like rations, they gather in small villages hobbled together about the exhaust vents. Unable to exhaust enough carbon from their blood they can’t even risk letting their core temp drop. They know atmosphere as well the cold to be their prison wall. There they huddle for warmth, rationing, and waiting for the next hoard of autonomous PolyGPTMarket Enforcement Drones. Waiting to learn whether their agenetic overlords placed enough stake on their survival, or that the day had come - that they might be swept down the shaft, macerated and baked into hot-dog flavored oblivion.

Did someone say…

Pish posh where else is there?

One average person volume per person.

that sounds like something a communist would ask

How much space you get depends on your credit score

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