a typical jpeg of 20 Mb
Uh what. Literally should be the highest fucking possible quality from a $10K camera if it’s that big. My raw images aren’t even that big usually.
I’ve read that the Trump administration is hiring him to archive all of the Epstein files using that format.
Compressing the Epstein files is easy: “Donald Trump raped children.” What’s my Weissman score?
On a similar note, I saw a story a bit back of someone saving input tokens by feeding the bot an image of a wall of text rather than the text itself and having it read the image via OCR.
Satire and reality are too hard too distinguish these days.
I see this one all the time on LinkedIn, the management rubes love it
Trying to find it funny, but in 2026 it’s way too close to the bone and just makes me sad.
Had Sam Altman personally vocalized this article in full sincerity, I would not have been surprised.
It’s what Apple and MS basically do by uploading all your images to iCloud and showing the name in your images folder.
Edit to ask: is this what the human brain does when retrieving a memory?
Yeah. I first thought it’s about jpeg, then i read ai and i wasnt sure if its worrying stupidity reporting or bad satire. Edit: i thought '92 i mean
I compress my meals by putting them into a blender to liquify them before consumption!
Amateur. I can compress entire seasons of a TV series to a few bytes. All I have to do is type its title in Netflix and then BAM, gigabytes of video come out.
Sure, but Netflix has a lot of cache misses for my favorite shows. I found a random website that has compressed matches for thousands more shows and movies than Netflix
I pirate my shit.
The fuuuucking annoying part is that these weight trained models would be perfect for translation models, compression, etc. An llm is already kind of a really efficient lossy compressor but you could actually make it lossless and an actual compressor if used properly. But instead people are literally telling llms to translate instead of training models that are for translating. The technology isnt the problem itself, its the industry and capitalism.
lol no you cannot make it lossless.
Enhance!
Lmfao “tears of joy”
Precisely! We human people all know that tears definitely do not express joy.
Correct?
Throw some angel investment cash at this guy already!
Is it a compression when you need presumably gigabites of a model to reconstruct the data?
It’s basically the same as saying I can shatter compressions records by hashing the thing and using a rainbow table to decompress it.
A roughly 340MB model at fp16 is all it takes to beat xz and zstd by 2x compression on text
They’re using domain-specific LLMs to compress narrow-domain data. Their text compression LLM was trained on, and then tested on, legal text and medical text.
There’s no reason one couldn’t apply the domain-specific-compressor idea to a conventional lossless text compressor, essentially moving much of the dictionary from the compressed file to the program itself. I don’t know if anyone’s tried that. I’d like to know how that compares.
There’s a number of compression projects working on this, this is the first that comes to mind
Non paywalled
I’d be more interested in lossy compression tho. Few % of image quality loss for multiplying compression ratio is mega useful.
I know this is a joke but honestly if an engineer figured out how to make a Jpeg 600 bytes it would be impressive (obviously don’t destroy the original even if all worked right.)
That seems fundamentally impossible.
If you’re just doing plain black and white, no grey scale, even ignoring headers the most you can get out of that is 4800 pixels. Say maybe 120x40 or 75x64.
Add in headers to tell the machine where each pixel actually goes and you’re looking at way less.
Want greys or color in your image? Forget about it.
if an engineer figured out how to make a Jpeg 600 bytes it would be impressive
Why use many pixel when few pixel do trick?
If you zoom out really far, you can kinda see it…
something something information theory.
All fun and games until you post a story about how clumsy your dad was and now all your photos are updated to show him as just a giant thumb…with thumbs for arms, and legs, and hands and feet, and fingers and toes. Just all thumbs, all the way down. Like tripping on acid with Rita Repulsa.
sknaht
All I see is a police man wearing red, I don’t get it.
Dd…ddaadd?
I imagine you could actually make an insane compression algo if you used AI as support for regular jpg compression. Not this way tho.
Your imagination is not how computer science works
This is satire right? Right? Lmao.
Yes.
Sweet, glad we cleared that up 😉
Two thoughts. First, there is a way to high chance that some people are basically doing this already or are taking inspiration from this. Second, the tell that it’s a joke article is that they bothered to destroy the prints, which implies that they bothered to scan them as well.
