Diogenes: Behold, God!
God: eternal and omniscient.
Also god: surprised pikachu.
“Fuck you, and fuck you, and fuck you,“ (to aquatic life) “you’re cool,” (to last land animal group) “and fuck you. You’re out.”
—— God, probably
edit: punctuation
I like how God decided to ragequit The Sims game he was playing.
Man, what a shit deity. So much for “omnipotent” if he can’t create shit he won’t regret.
I remember a cartoon I saw in a magazine decades ago. It was 2 people, both obviously gods. The one that was larger and bearded was looking down on a smaller child like person. The child was showing the adult a planet he had created, (earth) in his cupped hands. The adult sized god looks down at it simply says, “And now that you have had your little joke…”
God: is all loving
Creates an extinction event because he’s in bad mood
Haven’t you ever played the sims?
“AH CRAP, FUCKED THIS WHOLE RUN UP, TIME TO RESTART THE SIM. FUUUUUUU”
He’s still refining his prompts
Except we’re stuck in the one more turn endgame and things are getting weird
“Getting”?
“bad mood”
Genesis 6:5 Then God, seeing that the wickedness of men was great upon the earth and that every thought of their heart was intent upon evil at all times,
Also god ‘hell yeah chosen people, go murder them rats with no concern, strip down their girls and fuck em in the pussy holes!’
Only the shittiest of carpenters blames the tools he made himself, for his own embarrassment.
Flooding the earth was the best he could come up with? He’s supposed to be all knowing and all powerful. He could’ve worked something out without resorting to genocide.
Who amongst us hasn’t woken up hangry and done some light genociding before breakfast
You could have easily cropped out the snickers part. Corpo plugs aren’t really welcome here.
crop the snickers part, you got it
oh we’ve got an edgy one here
no ads pls
ty
Those flies totally had it coming!
Except to Job, he for whatever reason hated that guy and loved to torment him.
A lot of people have jobs they hate
God predicted capitalism
God
Regret
Is God’s in-moment regret a part of his plan?
“I need to look like I didn’t see this coming.”
”God works in mysterious ways ”
Genesis 6:7 he said, “I will eliminate man, whom I have created, from the face of the earth, from man to other living things, from animals even to the flying things of the air. For it grieves me that I have made them.”
People say this is a conflict with being omniscient, but that’s thinking temporally. For an entity that’s timeless, it’s all happening at once (or there is no once, it just all is) so he can have a master plan and make mistakes too. There’s probably more coming.
That doesn’t have any logic, how being timeless excuse a perfect entity for making mistakes?
Logic, for religion. How would that work? I was just using their words to try and create some kind of jargon to make it work. Clearly it doesn’t. Would love to know if the downvotes are for your stated reason, or from upset theists. They don’t like to look too much behind the curtain.
make mistakes
Sounds like you’re saying God isn’t perfect, you little heretic.
If there was a god of any type, he sucks. But since there isn’t a designer of any sort, the mess we see around us (good and bad) is completely understandable.
Heretic is typically used on a believer that migrates away from the official dogma, either a little or a lot. Fortunately I was never part of that.
He either knew it was a mistake before he even thought to start like they say and fucked up on purpose, or he isnt all knowing and is as fickle as any man, making him hardly a god at all
So are u saying they aren’t omniscent?
Hey, we all get a headcanon for our fandoms, right?
Us too buddy, us too
Beginning of the book, he’s already done with us.
Some clever bastard figured out an exploit (buoyancy) and humanity has just been going ham on god’s plan of creating utopia since. He’s just been trying to come up with ways to wipe humanity without a full reset since and the fuckers keep out-engineering and out-breeding his efforts.
Sooner or later he’s going to have to eat crow and reconcile with the god of Jupiter or with Sol to either fling a big rock from the asteroid belt or send a giant solar flare. It’s a hard sell, though. After bragging for so long about creating life, both are a little sick of Terra. Besides, they kind of like that more of Terra’s insane little creations revere them than revere Terra.Like a streamer who ragequits 90 seconds into his first game because he’s not immediately goated at it
Tbh the world being God streaming a game of the Sims makes more sense
Being fair, I’ve only been here a little under thirty years and I’m already thoroughly sick of us as a whole. I can’t imagine an eternity of it.
67!
1,105,185,179,339,051,069,340,904,821,109,256,497,792,958,645,880,288,624,051,564,500,008,100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 ?
What about that number?
Too long
What are you talking about? It rolls right off the tongue
0118, 999, 88199, 9119, 725…3
🫲 🫴🫷🫸👈👉
🤷♂️🤷♂️
Not the fish though. Seems that God was an evolutionist and agreed the transition to land was a bad idea.
Another boomer announcing their wiping. Tmi grannie, sheez.
