Scott Metzger | Bluesky | Patreon

Transcript

A raven is shopping in a store. He’s saying to the raven employee behind the counter, “A human has been feeding me all month. I want to give her something nice.” The raven employee is smiling and saying “Nothing exudes quality like a Heineken bottle cap.” The store sign on the wall reads “Fran’s Fancy Things.”

  • michaelalf@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Friendly reminder to not feed birds human food. There are many native birds here in Australia with food dependency issues and malformed beaks due to the lack of nutrients and minerals.

      • michaelalf@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        Definitely includes bread, its likely a big cause of beak issues. The keratin that makes up the beak grows continuously, and needs foods like wild nuts, seeds, and bark to wear it down. Bread, obviously, doesn’t do this. Also, if a bird’s stomach is “full” with bread, it won’t forage for it’s regular food, and will miss out on the vitamins and minerals it needs to survive.

        • lugal@sopuli.xyz
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          4 days ago

          Human food definitely includes bread.

          Can confirm. I know quite a number of humans and yes, they do eat bread from my experience

    • JackFrostNCola@aussie.zone
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      4 days ago

      I like to throw snails from my garden up in the air so they land/crack on the sidewalk out front and hope that some lucky crow sees it

  • BucketBong@p.hobo.social
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    5 days ago

    How does a person, let’s say me, befriend crows? I really want to be their friend, but I don’t know how to.

    • CheeseNoodle@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      I feed them bird feed peanuts (unsalted, out of shell) I wouldn’t say they’re my friends exactly but they’re pretty comfortable around me and will land where I put the food before I’ve even walked away.

      • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        I’ve been feeding my local crows unsalted shelled peanuts for more than five years. They know me and fly into the tree above my driveway and caw when they see me. They’re still not at all comfortable around me and won’t come down for the nuts until I go back inside. They’ve never given me any kind of gift unless you count the bird shit on my car.

        They’re like a Marvel movie in terms of power comparison. If a hawk shows up, they will chase it away. Meanwhile, a single bluejay a tenth their size will chase off five crows by itself. And the crows will just stand there glumly watching a squirrel eat all their peanuts.

    • HikingVet@lemmy.ca
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      5 days ago

      I am trying to get crows in my neighbourhood used to me pointing a camera in their direction. They seem to enjoy roasted peanuts in the shell.

      • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        Like most people, they’re highly motivated by food.

        Find where they roost and feed them. Roasted peanuts, etc, are a good option (just avoid super salty stuff.)

        Be patient and set the food down and walk away to start, then walk less far then set it down and stay close and so on.

        Also remember that they have excellent memory and can recognize individuals, so they will remember you. They might even come find you.

        (And don’t be mean. They will remember you! And they might even come find you.)

        • Axolotl@feddit.it
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          4 days ago

          And don’t be mean. They will remember you! And they might even come find you

          Crows are nice friends, but if you become their enemy…CHANGE CITY!!

          • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

            there’s a huge in the city where I work. Hundreds of birds. Sometimes when it’s extremely cold… they roost in a few trees at my building. They seem to move around a bit; in any case, I knew a guy that made the dumb decision to shout at them.

            They did not let him forget his mistake. And, yeah. I’m not sure changing town was enough… dude was a total dick so I’m there for the pettiness.

    • phonics@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      Can we not just give them strips of aluminium foil or something. They seem to be into shiney stuff

  • UnfortunateShort@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    I tried to get some crows to like me (and scare off the pigeons), so put some some nuts on my balcony. Sadly they’re too skittish to come near me. I know this is basically a good thing but… Why fren shaped :(

    • robocall@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      Throw the nuts on the ground near your balcony. Then, leave nuts on your balcony. They will eventually learn you are a source for nuts.

  • SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org
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    4 days ago

    Luckily there are a lot of great smaller breweries in my neck of the woods, so I don’t think too many people will drink Heineken round here. God bless

    • Joelk111@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      Just because you and I mostly drink stuff from local breweries doesn’t mean a lot of people don’t drink the big-box stuff.