Pee sitting down, you coward
Seriously. Why stand, miss, clean up your own piss (now or later), then repeat all that every time? Also: standing causes splashing - it NEVER all goes into the bowl.
So this happens because the urethra loses moisture and welds shut, then pee chooses the least-resistance path. If you can’t pee sitting ('cause it’s easier), one trick is to clamp your dick and push to pee, then release. The pressure will open the urethra wide and a beautiful, directed stream of piss will come out. Also, pull your foreskin back when peeing and clean afterwards with a dab of toilet paper. Fellating persons will thank you!
I stopped reading at “clamp your dick”
Piss after jacking off, anon.
So there’s this really cool trick:
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Face AWAY from the toilet with the heels of your feet close to the base.
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Un-button/tie/velcro/zip the whole waistband (not just the fly) such that you can-
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Lower your entire pants to the floor.
Now this part can be a bit tricky and does take some practice to keep your balance but
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Bend your knees down into a squat while leaning ever so slightly backwards (you can put a hand on a nearby solid object such as the sink or a wall to steady yourself. They also make raised seats with handles on either side if you need help with this).
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Situate your buttocks firmly on the seat.
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Separate your thighs such that you can
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Point your penis down between your legs towards the toilet bowl.
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Proceed to urinate.
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Hygiene is the same as peeing using other techniques.
This technique is all but foolproof; it is almost impossible to miss the toilet bowl.
Hope this helps!
DO NOT FUCK UP STEP 7
You forgot to state that the lid should be up
Now I’ve got piss everywhere
OK you have a point that I will only grant because I’m so used to finding the lid left up despite my best efforts but you are correct.
You’re either a woman or have a small pee pee and never had your pee pee touch the inside of the toilet bowl when you try to stick it into the tiny gap between your groin and the toilet basin.
I’d rather pee in split streams than rub my precious dick on the inside of a toilet bowl.
How do you poop? Do you hold your dick up?
Where do you put your ass when you poop? I sit on the toilet seat, and also rest my pee pee on the toilet seat in front of me
That has a lot less to do with the size of your cock and way more to do with the size of your ass.
Lose some weight. I’m well endowed and have only ever had an issue of “where penis go” when I tried to go while fully erect when I was a string bean of a teenager, and again as an adult when I weighed around 275 lbs and tried to go with a chub.
Might also be a grower vs shower thing too, but your experience is not anywhere as common as you think.
But then, wouldn’t it flop tothe floor? It makes no sense!
Sitting can be very difficult first thing in the morning sometimes. Well, not the sitting part but the getting your dick to point down into the bowl part.
On those days you lie down on the toilet in a planking position, penis pointing down into the toilet
Some mornings, after you sit, you need to bend over until your forehead is on your feet.
I prefer to put my hands on the floor and lift my feet up against the wall.
Well step 1 should be: Beat that meat into submission
1+1=2
2+2=4
4+4=8
8+8=16
16+16=32
32+32=64
64+64=128
128+128=256
256+256=512
512+512=1024
1024+1024=2048
2048+204… submission (if not, sing this, with the same voice ☞ https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=NfnTKUkCafo
You forgot the most important step:
- Wash your roommates hairy ass grease off the seat.
Usually why I stand.
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There is surgery that can help anon
Pull back your foreskin or sit down
or, y’know, you could sit down. saves on cleaning even when you fail at handling your dick.
You apparently have no idea the dick’s talent for aiming for the crack between the seat and rim, no matter how you go about “tucking” it downwards to try to prevent just that. Even sitting, leaning so far forward your hands are on the floor, is no guarantee.
I agree that this can happen, but at least its pretty rare. Standing while peeing however makes a mess in a radius around the toilet every time. I mean, when you live alone and have no guests ever then this might not be an issue, but in every other case it’s pretty nasty.
I’m glad to learn that mine lacks that talent. I never even knew that was a thing.
But then you risk it touching the inside parts of the toilet which is nasty
clean your toilet mr long schlong
So the options are: pee sitting down and always have clean the inside of the toilet. Or pee standing up, and sometimes clean what you missed
Or y’know, just clean the toilet regularly regardless of whether you’re standing or sitting.
I think you misunderstand the issue.
Unless you actually really clean the inside of the toilet bowl after every time you take a piss?
Shouldn’t cleaning the toilet and bathroom interior in general regularly be the default?
Yes, like weekly. But I pee at least 3 times a day, and would have to clean it after every use. No?
I pee on the inside, it gets dirty. Next time I want to pee I need to clean it again, or clean it immediately after I pissed.
Growers win again
Anon needs to add “pee” between the fapping and sleeping in his bedtime routine, and the leftover spunk won’t be around to do that.
Check the meatus for lint. Somehow, there’s always fucking lint!
“Me and my dick no longer see eye to eye.”
“…That’s probably for the best, ophthalmologically speaking.”
This sounds like a circumcised circumstance?
The perks of living alone. You just flush and go about your day.
I swear I always get a cupful trapped in the hood every time I’m wearing light coloured trousers and then it escapes when I stand up.
I can’t believe I have to say this.
Pull the foreskin back. Or sit/sqaut at a toilet and dry/dab with toilet paper.
Maybe not take a piss with a morning boner could help
Can’t knock the solution, it does work
